What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

What are the reasons for people being banned from social media sites like Twitter and Instagram? Why is it considered a big deal?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

How could Trump, with his deplorable garbage supporters, manage to win an election?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Is it okay for a wife who comes home from a date to tell her husband what she did?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

How do I stop someone from forcing/pestering me to become gay/bisexual when I already want to be straight?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

I’ve a dismissive avoidant partner who said that he’s overwhelmed by our relationship and that he wants to break up, how do I get him back?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

I'm a 28-year-old guy who has never been in a relationship, nor can I seem to find someone who wants to be in one with me. Why do I feel like a freak?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

TEXT:

Can you tell me a depressing story?

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Why is it important for Hollywood celebrities to come out against Trump?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Why are German films often so formulaic even though Germany is a European culture? I love them but they follow formula very closely like Hollywood. What are the best German films?

Make Nazis afraid again!

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

How did you know you weren't the narc?

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.